Agony with God

Agony with God

Raised as God feared person
Having fear to God may be good
But having fear is no use

Prayed for best
Working hard for the rest
Nothing happened as I thought
Blaming myself
For my bad decisions
Don’t have courage
To blame the God

Prayed my level best
Cried from heart
Prayed with tears
Nothing happened
Blaming myself
For not praying enough
Don’t have courage
To say God is deaf

Stand in the cross roads
Asking for help
Keeping the trust
Stumbling on the stones
Blaming myself
For not walking correct
Don’t have courage
To say God is dumb

Accepted the defeat
Learned to live with it
Fought enough in life
Scolding myself
For not having enough strength
To fight anymore
God want to say
I need to be optimistic

Theories are good
Theology is good
Prayers are good
All looks good
Just to read

Everybody is praying
Praying by kneeling
Praying by raising hands
Still I am surprising to see
So many are dying
So many are begging
So many are starving
Is there any stop to all this?

God, help me to stand
Help me to walk
Help me to laugh
Help me to stay healthy
Help me to live happily

I am crying in dark
I am weeping in the corner
Hiding my pain
Learned to laugh with ease
Even though I lost my self
I praise your name loudly
To give you success
In front of the world

Written with pain in heart (Not physical pain)

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